Life With Carol

Handling Troublesome In-laws

The last aspect is their relationship with their families. Some people may be adults, but their families can not let them be who they should be. They still control them and make decisions for them. A man or woman ready for marriage should not be controlled or have someone determine what they do or not. Well, they can give their opinions, but he or she is the last person who should make the decision. You do not want to be with someone who even cancels your dates just because he received a call from home, to do an obvious thing. Should you find yourself in such a situation, then you should end things before it is too late. You can choose to ask them if they ever feel that they are doing too much for their family more than they do for themselves, that with this kind of energetic drain, they can never establish their own family. ” From my observation, you are unable to sit still and say no to your family and let them organize their life. You seem to gain a sense of validation and importance in the world when you are rescuing them.” Make sure you challenge them before you leave, because you have decided to leave anyway, so you have nothing to lose. Sometimes, you may have to deal with a person who says they can not move things forward until their mother or father approves. Ask yourself, how many other things will the mother or father need to approve. Some families may get too close to you soon. Anytime you start talking to a person and their family starts coming to your space, it’s not love. It’s either control or you are being sucked into rescuing them from their troublesome son or daughter.

How do you Know a Man is Not Interested in you?

Someone once told me that if you see a man and feel some chemistry, there is a ninety percent chance that he feels the same way about you. I used to believe that, and I did for some time, but not anymore. You may meet a man and naturally feel like he is the one or have the illusion that he is the one, if I may say so, but every time you see him, whenever you talk to him, it always feels like there is something not adding up. In this blog, we talk about how you can tell that a man is not interested in you. Does not Pick your Calls It’s normal to call someone, but they do not pick up the call. I mean, it’s a busy world. He could be at work, maybe in a meeting, driving, or at home taking a shower, or in a noisy place. There are endless reasons. We cannot therefore assume that if a man does not call you, he is not interested in you. However, if you call him and he does not pick up, if he is someone who is interested in you, they will have an automatic response that, as soon as you call and he cannot pick up, you will receive a message saying he will call you back. If you do not receive any message, then he should call you back as soon as he possibly can. I do not take it personally if my man does not pick up my calls, but if it becomes a pattern, like he does not always pick up my calls, never calls back, or calls back after two days, then there is a big problem, he is simply not interested. Never Takes you Out on a Date Normally, a man who is interested in you will go out of his way to take you out on a date. If you refuse, he will persist until you accept to go out with him. He will be patient with you, and even if it takes you six months to accept going out with him, he will wait. You will know he is not interested if he never takes you out with him. He never tells you he Loves You A man who is interested in you will not struggle to express his emotions to you, he will tell you he loves you. He may not say it at the beginning just to make sure you are comfortable and so instead, he may say things like he likes how you smile, he loves how you walk, he loves how you look at him and when he gets more comfortable and confident enough to take action, he will say the magic words, ‘I love you.’ If he is not interested, I love you are words you will wait for until the end of time. Never Complain About Anything you Do You will know a man is not interested if he never questions what you are doing. If you are a student, he will never ask why you spend all your time studying, why you go out with friends, which friends you are going out with, where exactly you are going, or what time you plan to be back. He will never ask you why you are home late. If you do not prepare dinner, he will not ask why, instead, he will walk into the kitchen and prepare his own meal. If your friends come to the house, party, or listen to loud music, they stay until midnight. He does not like it, but he won’t say anything. This guy is looking for a way out, he is not interested, and whatever you do is none of his business. Never Makes Time for You If he loves you, you will become his priority, and he will make every effort to spend quality time with you every week. If he cannot be with you physically, he will call you and send assuring text messages to show that he is there for you. He can never be too busy for you because you are his woman, and he cares. If he does not make any time for you, he does not care, you can as well move on with your life. Avoids you on Valentines Day Valentine’s Day is a special day, it’s the day of love. This is one day that I personally plan for and look forward to. Valentine’s Day is a day that can actually tell you if your man is interested in you or not. If he has two girlfriends, he will spend the day with the one he loves, and the other one will wait to hear his excuses. If he is interested in you, he may just confess his love for you on Valentine’s Day. He talks to you at his convenience A man who is interested in you will keep the conversation going both day and night, he makes it a habit to talk to his woman. If he talks to you or maybe calls once a week, he is not interested. When you call him, he does not pick up the call, but then you receive a message that says, “I’ll call back,” but he never calls back. You call him, but he does not take the call and calls you back two weeks later, like nothing happened, and he does not even talk about it. He is not interested; actions speak louder than words. Never Introduce you to Family and Friends You are dating this guy, but you do not know any of his relatives or friends, We can say, Okay, let’s be patient, let’s give time sometime, but six months later, you do not know his friends or family. You should know that he is not interested. If he is interested, the longest it should take for you to meet his family is six months. Friends you can meet as soon as possible.

Why Marriages Fail: 18 Reasons

Marriage is the union between two people that is expected to last a lifetime. In a Muslim marriage, the man is allowed to marry four women as long as he can take care of all of them equally. The man must get consent from his first wife before he can marry a second wife, and when he is ready for wife number three, he must get consent from his first and second wives. In this blog, we talk about why marriages fail. Financial Issues You can never predict the future. People get married, and then life happens. The husband may lose his job, and the family could struggle financially so much that the wife decides to leave the marriage. We have also seen instances where the man leaves his wife because she does not have any source of income and goes ahead to marry another woman who is financially independent. Issues about money are usually hard on a couple, and for the relationship to actually last, the two will have gotten in love with each other out of pure love. Family Love is supposed to be for two people, and the rest of the family is expected to support them. When a man gets married, his family should support his relationship by accepting and considering his wife as part of the family. And when a woman gets married, her family should make the man feel wanted and accepted as part of the family. What we see happening, however, is that the man’s mother mistreats his wife, calls her names sometimes, tells her to leave, and the man’s siblings do the same. The lady gets frustrated and eventually decides to leave the marriage, not because she does not love her husband, but because she is getting too much pressure from the husband’s family. It becomes even worse when the man attacks his wife because of what his mother or siblings say about her. In the worst-case scenario, the man’s mother could go to the extent of accusing her daughter-in-law of attempting to steal from her, and this causes conflict that eventually breaks the marriage. On the other hand, if the woman’s family does not like her husband, they can make it their mission to make sure the marriage does not last. These people could even scheme to set up her husband with other women, take videos and pictures, and then prove to her that her husband is cheating. The marriage might end if the woman becomes disillusioned by the evidence and loses faith in her husband. Lack of Intimacy Life can get so busy that when couples meet at home, they are both too tired to look at each other. This may continue for a prolonged period of time, which may create distance between the couple and cause them to lose interest in each other. They suddenly start to live like brothers and sisters; one of them gets distructed, and it’s over for both of them. To be honest, intimacy is one of the most important reasons people get married. I mean, besides having children, couples also need to enjoy the fruit that God made possible for married couples. Lack of commitment When people live together for a long time, they become so comfortable with each other that they start taking everything for granted. For marriage to work, the couple must be committed to each other, but if its only the wife who keeps calling to find out how her husband is doing during the day, she is the only one who sends text messages to say simple things like ‘I love you’, she is the only one who asks for a conversation to resolve issues when they have some misunderstanding, then the marriage fails. You can only do so much as a human being, and so, even as a committed wife, you get tired at some point and give up. Falling Out of Love Being in love is a beautiful thing, and it does not happen every day that you meet someone and fall in love. Love is special, and when you meet the one, you just know. When a couple gets married, they are usually at the peak of their union, and they feel like they cannot leave without each other. Then they start growing their family and expanding their careers. The man gets lucky and gets a much better job, earning more than he could ever imagine. He changes and starts mistreating his wife, ignoring her, and embarrassing her in public. When his wife is in conflict with, for instance, his sister, he protects her and looks down on his wife. It will not take too long before the wife falls out of love and decides to walk out of the marriage. We all know that when a woman forgives her man a thousand times and gets tired, it’s definitely over for him. Unfaithfulness Some people just find it difficult to remain faithful to their partners. It does not matter what you do, as a woman, you may even go down on your knees to assure him of your love, but he still cheats. You keep his house clean, prepare his meals, make sure the home is running smoothly, listen to him, and never quarrel. You try everything in your power to make your man feel loved, but he still cheats, unfortunately. I recently watched a video on YouTube about a pastor’s wife who called a counsellor for help from the OWN YouTube channel. When the counsellor knocked on the door, the lady opened, and she started crying. When asked what the problem was, she said that her husband has cheated on her with twenty different women, ten of whom attend their church. Apparently, when she found out that her husband was cheating and asked him, he confirmed that he cheated with twenty women and had a child with one. She moved out but still went to church with her husband and children, like everything was okay,

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