Life With Carol

How Your Attachment Style Affects Your Relationship

Your attachment style is often formed based on how you were raised as a child. If you look back at your childhood and your primary caregivers, you can either feel jealous, anxious, or secure. All these attachment styles will affect the kind of relationship you have as an adult. The good news is, an attachment style can change as you become more self-aware and heal your inner child. There are four main attachment styles and they all affect how you interact with your partner differently.

Secure Attachment Style

People with secure attachment style tend to feel safe in their relationships. They are well grounded and can emotionally regulate themselves. They learned all these skills from their primary caregiver, who was present and did not dump their stress on the child. As such, this person knows how to create boundaries. Even though they might want to be in a relationship, they are more drawn to creating meaningful connections over just getting into whatever relationship they want to. Despite this, if they are together with someone with an insecure attachment style, it can change their attachment style after a while.

Anxious Attachment Style

Someone with anxious attachment style often feels insecure in a relationship. They need constant reassurance and will overreact if they feel like their relationship is being threatened. The anxiety stems from inconsistent parenting. The primary caregiver must have been one who was inconsistent with physical and emotional attention and the child never knew when the parent would be back or there for them. Anxious attachment style: people tend to feel guilty for being too needy or clingy but it is something they cannot seem to stop doing. The only way to help a person with this attachment style is to have them deal with their issues of abandonment first.

Avoidant-Dismissive Attachment Style

Avoidance are the opposite of anxious attachment. While they might want attention, they are wary of anyone getting too close to them. Avoidant attachment often feels independent and sees no need for a relationship. As such, they come off as uncaring and arrogant. All this stems from having a primary caregiver who was never there for the child in their early years. As such, they tend to take care of everything on their own.  Even though avoidant people think they do not need human connections, they actually do. It is something every human being needs. One needs to be vulnerable enough to admit it.

Disorganized Attachment Style

A person with this attachment style tends to believe they do not deserve love and affection. They often find intimate relationships unsettling and hardly trust their partner. The person often gets this from an abusive primary caregiver who is both loved and often a source of terror to the person. As a result, the individual is unhinged and might also struggle with substance abuse.

How to Deal with Insecure an Attachment

If you have an attachment style that is not secure, then no matter how badly you want it, you will ruin whatever relationship you are in. The one thing you need to do to remedy this is talk to a therapist. They can help you unpack whatever trauma you have and give you coping mechanisms. While it might not be a one day affair, it will definitely get you to a point where you can form meaningful relationships.

Your attachment style determines how you view human connections and, in extension, how you view the world. Being securely attached will help you form better connections and make the right decision when it comes to relationships. Talk to a therapist today if you have doubts on what your attachment style might be.

The Role of Love Languages in a Relationship
The Role of Love Languages in a Relationship
08 April 2024
The five love languages stand for how you give and receive love. While this is not something many people...
Read More
The 90 Day Rule in a Relationship
The 90 Day Rule in a Relationship
08 April 2024
The 90 day rule is a concept that Steve Harvey brought up in his best-selling book, Act like a Lady,...
Read More
Signs You Might Be the Red Flag in a Relationship
Signs You Might Be the Red Flag in a Relationship
08 April 2024
Recently, people have been talking about spotting a red flag in a person and how to walk away from it....
Read More
The 80-20 Rule in a Relationship and the Role It Plays
The 80-20 Rule in a Relationship and the Role It Plays
08 April 2024
Everyone often looks forward to having a perfect relationship. It might be based on books read or movies...
Read More
Importance of Therapy in Building a Healthy Relationship
Importance of Therapy in Building a Healthy Relationship
08 April 2024
Having a fulfilling and healthy relationship can be hard work. There are things both of you need to come...
Read More
How to Improve your Physical and Mental well-being
How to Improve your Physical and Mental well-being
08 April 2024
The transformative electricity of workout: improving physical and mental well-being In today’s fast-paced...
Read More
The Role of Nutrition in Promoting Overall Well-being
The Role of Nutrition in Promoting Overall Well-being
08 April 2024
The complex interplay of nutrition: Uncovering its profound impact on overall well-being Embarking...
Read More
The Impact of Social Media on Mental Health
The Impact of Social Media on Mental Health
08 April 2024
Managing the digital maze: The effect of social media on intellectual health Social media plays a crucial...
Read More
Managing Your Well-Being in a Fast-Changing World
Managing Your Well-Being in a Fast-Changing World
08 April 2024
The Path to Oneness of the Heart: Managing Your Well-Being in a Fast-Changing World In our modern,...
Read More
Sound sleep and it's impact on well-being are multi-dimensional
Sound sleep and it's impact on well-being are multi-dimensional
08 April 2024
The Connection between sleep and overall wellbeing In the relentless pursuit of careers and achievement,...
Read More

Recents

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life With Carol

© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED TO LIFE WITH CAROL | By using this website you agree to the Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy